Thursday, January 19, 2012

The Gift of Bad TV

Do you have a television show you watch that makes you feel better about your life? I am not talking about Dr. Oz or other somewhat helpful shows that make you think about a new point of view or give helpful and enlightening advice. No, I am talking about bad television, brain candy, just drivel...but drivel that makes your realize your life is pretty top notch. I have a few shows that I watch when I am having a bad day that pretty much always bring me back to feeling good about being me. Here they are, with brief explanations...

  • The Millionaire Matchmaker. Why you ask? These people have millions and live big fabulous lives. Yes, and true. However, they are alone and a good share of them are nuttier than a damn fruitcake. God bless Patti Stanger (the actual matchmaker), she tries, and she is laughing all the way to the bank. Knowing that money can not buy love or sanity is a comfort on the days when even the dog is being disagreeable. Plus, it is just entertaining to see awkward dates. You can not get this up close look at first dates any other way. Well, I suppose I could go on first dates again...but my husband would frown upon that and I do not want to personally experience such awkwardness.
  • Gene Simmons Family Jewels. The name makes me smile and the sheer amount of dysfunction in that family makes anything my spouse, daughter, or son do, seem just fine. Mostly, Gene Simmons does a fine job of making any other man on the planet look like an amazing catch and a prince of a guy. Sure it is staged, and mindless, but it will make you hug your husband and thank him for not being the bass player of KISS. Although, I do have a soft spot in my heart for a certain bass player.
  • COPS. It is obvious why this show will make you feel better about your life. Lets face it not being wrestled to the ground, frisked, or having your vehicle searched for contraband is a good thing. Everyday I do not have an outstanding warrant for my arrest, or a suspended driver's license, is a simple win for me. Why, on occasion, I like to see people who are less fortunate in the eyes of law get caught seems mean spirited...but as mentioned, it is to make me appreciate what I have. And not being shackled in the back of a squad car makes my day.
  • Jerseylicious. This show is about a hair salon in New Jersey and the train wrecks that work there. The fake tans, big hair, crazy nails, and make-up & clothing that are the envy of every drag queen, makes for good mindless television. Dramatic and over the top are under statements about this show. The fact that this is anyone's reality boggles the mind. This show will not make you think about life or anything else. Its over drama has an anesthetic quality, that can not be denied. Warning, at the commercial break you will feel the urge to apply two or three coats of mascara...just go with it. Big lashes won't kill you.
Those are a few of my top picks for escaping my reality, and then realizing my reality is so awesome I should have my own show. Just kidding, this particular brand of crazy can not be captured on film. Mindless television watching has its place and function. Also note, none of these shows are kid friendly. Perhaps that is another reason they are pure, guilty pleasures.

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