Resetting

Hello Stranger. That is how I felt when I logged on to blog this little ever so brief entry. I actually had to reset my password, because I had something clever that I would never forget as my password. However, I guess it was not clever enough. So now that it is reset I can begin. Strangely, my whole post is about "resetting". Not passwords, my life. It seems I have become caught in the morass of others' lives, and now I am struggling to see where I am in the whole picture. Thankfully, when I was talking to a friend earlier today, she is also in the same place and looking to "find what is hers". I am blessed to be in such good company in the "inner turmoil" struggle. Starting on September 6, 2011, my goal is to find my "thing". What this "thing" may be I have no clue. So I will be doing some soul searching, praying, and perhaps more soul searching, as I look to reset me.

September 6 is not a completely arbitrary date, it happens to be the first day of school. So it is somewhat logical.

Ex-People Pleaser

Hello, my name is Allison and I am a neglectful blogger. Sorry. However, apologies aside, I have had a breakthrough. Yes, a breakthrough, like people have in therapy, except I am not in therapy, this came through my own personal evolution and frustration. So here it is, I don't care. Yes, I realized through a series of recent events that I no longer really care what others think of me.

What?
She does not care?
How heartless!!!

Now to clarify my new, "I do not care" attitude. This does not apply to my family, and close friends. I will always care what those closest to me think about me. I love them and they matter. I also love myself enough to not let "others" opinions effect me any longer. This attitude applies to the "others". I no longer care if my children's' friend's mother thinks I am lovely or a complete witch. I know who I am. I am good mother, and decent person. So I do not need to conform to any standards set by others. The best part of my new mindset is no longer having to tolerate annoying situations. Prime example, carpools with kids that are obnoxious. If the parent is able to drive their child somewhere and is only asking me to drive so they can get out of driving, I am saying "No, we will see you there". I am not heartless, I will drive if it is schedule issue or car trouble, but just so "we can all go together", forget it. I do not have to deal with banal conversation while someones kid tears up my vehicle (and the parent ignores the behavior). Not happening anymore. My kids are well behaved, and properly threatened with consequences for poor behavior, before they enter another persons home or car, so they always are respectful. If others are not going to teach their offspring to act civil or face consequences, that is their problem. I do not care, I am not dealing with it. Bottom line, I am done being a "people pleaser", because it is unpleasing to me.

I know my new outlook is not going to be well received by many, luckily I don't care. Those nearest and dearest to me know that this was inevitable. I have said, "yes" and agreed to some pretty unbearable situations for too long. I was bound to either break or put my foot down. Now the foot is down. People pleasing is something unique to women. I have not often run into a man that is overly concerned about what the peripheral people in their lives think about them. Good job men, I am proud of you for not caring. Not that you care what I think. Likewise, I don't care that you don't care. See? This is fun already.

Happy Mother's Day!

Snow in April? (that sucks)

The title pretty much sums it up. The kids are off for their Spring Break and it looks like we can grab the sleds out of the rafters in the garage. That is just wrong. I feel like this month is suffering from schizophrenia or perhaps bipolar disorder. I am not a licensed medical professional, but I know that this constant shifting in temperature is not good for our collective psyche or our health. As a seasonal allergy sufferer this time of year is unpleasant enough for breathing freely. The only good thing is seeing the grass get greener and the trees gets little buds of leaves. Yes, the grass and pollen are my krypton, but they are pretty, colorful enemies. A fresh coating of snow is the last, LAST, L A S T thing we need. I know Michigan is famous for its fickle weather, but this month has been extreme and ridiculous, even for Michigan. Last Sunday is was in the 80's and the kids were asking to get sprayed by the hose while we were doing some outside clean up. Fast forward to today, one week later, upper 30's and winds that cut right through to the bone. My poor dog could not keep her ears from flapping in the wind on our walk. Okay, I will admit I was very entertained by the ear flapping, but she was not. Yes, this is a rant. However, I will tell you I feel better just writing it all out. However, I may engage in some primal scream therapy when I am shoveling my driveway, IN APRIL!!!!

Campaign for the 25 Hour Day

I am not sure how I am going pull this one off, but I am lobbying for an added hour to the day. I currently max out each of the 24 hour days I am given. I will admit that I still sleep, so perhaps I could get more out of a day if I quit sleeping, but that seems unwise, a bit painful, and down right dangerous for those who have to deal with me on a daily basis. Since my chosen vocation is that of a "professional volunteer" it would seem I could tailor my schedule to permit more free time. However, the professional volunteer business is booming. Many of the things I spend my time on really do not benefit me, but if it makes someone I love smile or feel better, I can't say no. Likewise, if it is for a cause or organization that I am passionate about I would rather share my talents with that group than just have some good old fashion downtime. Yes, that is a bit silly. Yes, it is also draining. Yes, it makes me crabby sometimes. Thus my appeal for an extra hour a day, all my own. The 25th hour will not be an hour to be shared, but an hour to personally consumed and savored for personal use ONLY. If I get my additional hour, I swear I will only use it for myself. Reading, exercising, writing, and painting nails are some of the top activities that would fill my hour. Those seem like a good balance between frivolous and personally enriching. Not wanting to disturb the laws of space and time for the rest of the universe, you too will have an extra hour to play with as you please. I am proud to head up this campaign for all of us. No thanks necessary, your personal enjoyment is thanks enough. So, what would you do with your extra hour per day?

Pet Peeve Monday

Today the list is long, and the day, I am informed, will still only contain 24 hours, so I need to be brief.

Last night while dining in a reasonably priced restaurant with my children, the people in the booth across from us drove me nuts. These people were complaining about every aspect of their reasonably priced meal. My daughter pointed this out to me, and she is at a very "complainish" stage in life. So if you are complaining enough to make her notice...well, you are doing something. First the coffee was too cold. The replacement coffee was too hot. (By the way, coffee is a hot beverage, thus the first complaint was valid. The second? That is called being a jerk). The man's reasonable prices steak was too tough. This reasonable priced restaurant is known for its pancakes, so why you would expect a Ruth's Chris style steak experience at a pancake house is beyond me. The complaints just kept flowing. In the meantime, my happy party of three was joyfully eating breakfast for dinner (a true delight). Well except my daughter who had to try the chicken and waffles, I am not sure how to classify that meal. She declared it a "taste treat". We had the same waitress as the complainers, a lovely person. Our food was prepared in the same kitchen, I even had coffee (it was great). I believe these people were just being malcontents. Perhaps they only see the bad in everything. Maybe they were angling to get a free meal. Whatever it was it reminded me that one of my pet peeves is people who go to reasonably priced restaurants and complain when they do not get five star food. It is on the same vein as people that are surprised that Taco Bell meat is not 100% beef. Really? That shocks you? The world must be a real trip for some people.

Happy Monday!

Motivational Speaker

Today I need a Motivational Speaker. No not a person that will tell me in five easy steps how to declutter my closets, or build a better connection with my spouse. I need an actual speaker, like a loud speaker, to follow me around yelling, "Do your list. You know you have more to do. JUST DO IT".

Yup, that kind of motivational speaker. My internal motivational speaker is broken today. Yesterday I was highly motivated. I did lots of laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, picked up the clutter on the counters, and I even washed down the kitchen cabinets. Yesterday I was the epitome of motivated. I was the spokes model for getting things done. Clearly, I over did it. Today I have a list and as I look at each item I say, "Nope, not now. Next". Then I get to bottom and go back to top and repeat. It is very repetitious and annoying. Where is motivated me? Did I use her all up yesterday, and now I am stuck with Apathetic Allie? No good proper work is done with Apathetic Allie. My mother would say, "It sounds like you are in a morass, a morose morass". Guess where I get my love of words and alliteration?

If I were motivated I would create this invention, the Motivational Speaker, to prod me on my way to accomplishing things when I feel like just sitting and reading a book. However, that seems like a lot of work. I know nothing of how to make an electronic gadget. Truth be told I am pretty sure there is already an "app" for it. There must be, there is an app for everything.

Today, if you are reading this, and you are motivated. Please create a Motivation Speaker for me and all the other inertia challenged people that need that extra bit of prodding now and then. However, I assume if you are reading this, you are also surfing the internet because you are avoiding doing something of purpose as well. In that case, enjoy. I am sure we will find our motivation again. Maybe not today, but soon. Happy Thursday!

Having A Quicky

Oh, do not get so excited. It is not Friday so I can not do Five for Friday. I do, however, have several little things on my mind and I am cleaning my kitchen. Let me rephrase that, I am "trying" to clean my kitchen. My words are pushing me to write, so write I must. Kitchen be damned.

1. When did that happen? Do you ever just look at a lamp, or into a corner of your home and see cobwebs or an insane layer of dust. Clearly this dust and webbing can not just happen overnight, but one day you look and think, "I am not Martha Stewart. I am not even a hobo Martha Stewart". These things creep up on me. Generally things like this spawn a mini cleaning frenzy. That is what happened in the kitchen today. The hood over the stove was crazy dusty. I swear last night when I was standing at that stove cooking that exact same hood was perfectly clean. We must have a dust elf that visited last night.
2. Spring pictures. When did schools decide that Fall school pictures were not enough and now they try to make people get Spring pictures taken of their children? I am fine with Fall pictures. I find that the picture packages are pretty expensive, but I roll with it once a year. Now I am being guilted into Spring pictures. Well, no I am not being guilted into anything because I am a strong woman, and I can say "no". Even the kids think its a dumb thing. They do not like Fall pictures, so they are glad to back me in my opposition to Spring pictures. It feels good to have a united front with them. It is a bit strange, since being a parent and being a kid so often puts us at odds with each other. Thank you stupid Spring picture flier for uniting a mother with her offspring.
3. LEGOS. I swear one of these days I am going to need to have a LEGO surgically removed from my foot. Clear LEGOS should be outlawed. My son does a great job cleaning up all except the "clears". I walk in his room and find the clears with my foot. OUCH. Generally I need to construct a string of obscenties long enough to make a sailor blush. Even worse, if the kids are home I have to clean it up. So then it sounds something like this, "Holy Mother of Pearl, I want to kick the sugar beat that invented froggin' clear LEGOS. What a flip floppin' jerk. My fooooot, my poooor fooooot". Yup, I pretty much can't stand the clear LEGO. Worst thing ever. Or until I think of something worse.

Thank you for indulging me in a quicky. Now back to that kitchen. I just peeked in there, it is not cleaning itself.